She Feels Like a Monster
by MingoGirl
Summary: <html><head></head>short songfic about Aryas feelings for Eragon. Set after the Blood-Oath Celebration. Song: Monster by Skillet. ExA. Enjoyz!</html>


**Well this is the product of a lot of boredom and too much free time. It's an E/A songfic to the song Monster by Skillet. It's about Aryas secret feelings for the Rider. Set after the Blood-Oath Celebration. Enjoy!**

**Monster**

_The secret side of me, I never let you see  
>I keep it caged but I can't control it<br>So stay away from me, the beast is ugly  
>I feel the rage and I just can't hold it<em>

Arya wanted to scream. The secret she was holding in her heart was trying to claw its way out. She tried to force it down, but was rapidly losing control of it. She tried to avoid Eragon by going back to Surda as soon as the sun rose after that night. But she was still losing control.

_It's scratching on the walls, in the closet, in the halls  
>It comes awake and I can't control it<br>Hiding under the bed, in my body, in my head  
>Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it end?<em>

Keeping this hidden from him made her feel like something was trying to claw out her heart, the cage for this horrid secret. Every time she saw him, she longed to tell him. She wanted so badly for him to came back to aid the Varden so she could reveal her feelings. She wished he would save her from herself.

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster<br>I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster, <em>

_I, I feel like a monster_

_I, I feel like a monster_

She could feel the words bubbling up onto her tongue every time the Rider walked by. She felt like a monster worse than the Ra'zac for what she was doing to him.

_My secret side I keep hid under lock and key  
>I keep it caged but I can't control it<br>'Cause if I let him out he'll tear me up, break me down  
>Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it end?<em>

She tried to keep her secret hidden beneath her skin, but it was so hard. She loved him so much. The cage her heart had become was growing weak, but she knew if she stopped fighting, the consequences would be catastrophic.

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin__  
><em>_I must confess that I feel like a monster__  
><em>_I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun__  
><em>_I must confess that I feel like a monster_

She felt her secret coming out as he walked into the tent. She felt even worse when she saw the pain in his eyes as he looked at her. She felt so terrible; she thought Galbatorix would be proud for the pain she was causing him.

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster<br>I, I feel like a monster  
>I, I feel like a monster<em>

She knew she would say it if she allowed him to get to close to her, so she quickened her pace to put her next to Nasuada. She couldn't force down her feelings of guilt.

_It's hiding in the dark, it's teeth are razor sharp  
>There's no escape for me, it wants my soul, it wants my heart<br>No one can hear me scream, maybe it's just a dream  
>Maybe it's inside of me, stop this monster<em>

She was losing control. He forced her to talk to him and she was screaming. Why couldn't he hear her? Why couldn't he see it in her eyes, how much she loved him? She knew she had to crush these feelings. She had to stop the monster that was killing her.

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster<br>I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster<em>

She felt it on the tip of her tongue, those three words that were destroying her from the inside out. Her living nightmare was only beginning…

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster<br>I've gotta lose control, he something radical  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster<em>

She felt it bubbling out of her lips, but this time the monster would not be contained. She had said it, but now she had to push him away yet again.

_I, I feel like a monster  
>I, I feel like a monster<br>I, I feel like a monster  
>I, I feel like a monster<em>

**Well there it is. How was it? Please tell me in a review!**__


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